Right now, it’s almost 12 midnight and I am here writing another entry while listening to a song I really like entitled, “Dreaming of You”. As I listen to the song, I occasionally get butterflies in my stomach while trying to understand the lyrics per sentence. Strangely, I don’t like what I am feeling right now.
It’s one of those nights that I can’t sleep without writing a piece. Recently, my mind is full of questions. It’s so messed up that I can’t even explain how chaotic it is inside.
It’s one of those nights where I’m listening to the same song on repeat, painting stories in my head that I know, would never happen. Yes, it will never happen.
It’s one of those nights where my heart feels so heavy for containing my feelings for so long. I’m a very expressive person and if I can’t express it, I need write it. With the given situation, I’d rather write it than say it.
I write nonstop until I can make a book. I write nonstop until I get tired. I write until I’m not confuse anymore.
But, tonight is one of those nights where I won’t be sleeping unless I stop crying.
I just want to hold you close
But so far, all I have are dreams of you
So I wait for the day, and the courage to say
How much I love you
Those lyrics keep on repeating on my mind. I know I should stop.
I know. I know.
But yeah, It’s one of those nights.